You may Kiss the Bride…If you can see her!
Thanks God wedding season is coming to a close…ok, it’s never closed, I know. But I have been to so many weddings this Summer (probably why I’ve been missing in action here, truthfully! Ironic, right?) that I have perma-wedding hangover. At least the booze was free for the most part! Guess I’d rather get drunk for free at a raging wedding than having to spend my own money at a bar every weekend. I’m a jerk…I know.
Since the majority of weddings I’ve been to have been my sucker friends that finally gave in and took the plunge, that means that I’ve been in a lot of them. I have a lot of good friends. The one thing I don’t understand is why anyone would hire a limo service and get a vehicle that didn’t have a tint job on them…seriously?!
There are few things worse about an otherwise awesome wedding than a stretch Lincoln Navigator without tinted windows…I didn’t even know they existed!
You know how when you go into a bar in the middle of the day and the very few people that are actually there are mostly tucked away in the dark corners and recesses of the bar? Why do you think that is? It’s because we do naughty things when we are drinking and it is built within us to hide it from the world so as not to be publicly shamed!
A couple got the cheap tint job…and now everyone knows!
I can’t think of another similar event to weddings that I have witnessed more debauchery inside the “wedding party” car, especially when it’s a tight nit group of friends like mine! Everyone is making out with everyone else, except the bride and groom, of course. They’re already so far up in each others’ grills they couldn’t be bothered with anything or anyone else anyway.
Nice No-Tint Job Bro…
So therein lies the problem with not having professional window tinting on your wedding parties vehicle, especially a SUMMER wedding. We don’t want people seeing what is going on inside, man! The tint (hopefully extra dark) on the windows is our “safety shield” from all the moms and dads and kids. We don’t want Mom and Dad admonishing the entire wedding party for the inappropriate behavior they see happening as the vehicle rolls up to the wedding hall…we know that they know it is happening, but we still feel that kiddish guilt and try to hide it from them.
Another problem. I shouldn’t, and the bride and groom shouldn’t, have to wear sunglasses inside a party bus just to be able to find the other people in the car. The bride and groom especially shouldn’t have to grope at each other (unless they want to) with one hand over their eyes to find the others lips every time someone starts a chant “Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!”, which happens way more times than necessary in my opinion.
Thankfully, the two otherwise smart decision making friends of mine that did go with the non-tinted party wagons this Summer learned their lesson and will NEVER rent or recommend a non-tinted vehicle to anyone ever again. Hopefully they never have a need to rent another “wedding party” vehicle…divorce sucks.
Window tint is your friend. Especially if you are young and rambunctious like me and my friends. We used to all be single and we all love our fun and window tinting on your wedding party’s vehicle makes us all feel safe from prying Mom and Dad eyes and enables us to relax and get wild!
My Mom and Dad don’t read this blog. I’ve never shared it with them, for probably obvious reasons. Do me and yourself a favor and don’t spread it around to yours either.
It’ll be our funny little secret!